When the world stops! Dealing with bad news?


We cannot see into the future

We all have busy lives and in the great scheme of things worries and fears about the future but many are so insignificant in reality but such is the pressures of modern life. In one day your life can change a visit to the doctor and then the awful realisation that you or a family member or friend may  have a  life threatening health problem.  It is amazing how many say they feel well yet things are wrong, the body is amazing on how it copes, the mind is different .  I have several friends faced with these problems just now and is near to home for me and it brings back how lucky we are to have an NHS despite many of our moans. These are the time where normal worries and problems are put in perspective and all the matters is health, family and friends.

We all cope with this in different ways but many try to be there for those that matter. Modern medicine allows many of us a great chance of living a normal life again where many years ago Cancer,Leukaemia that took my mother so young have made huge strides in treatment. It is so much better that today we speak about  Cancer and medical problems  openly nowadays. I was a lot younger when my Mum died and it took years to sink in she was gone. If I had the chance I would do with things differently. I was not told my Mum was ill until near the end. I was down in Wales at the time and only getting home twice a year.,  My family  decided not to tell me until the very end and Mum hid it in our weekly phone calls. That was they way they dealt with it in the 80’s.  I think I had seen so much tragedy in my life in the mountains that my mind could not cope with losing my mother?

I have become so different as I get older when I hear of upsetting news I am far more open and cry nowadays, but after that I am ready to help in any practical way I can. If you have someone who is in such a situation and had bad news it is so hard. Everyone copes so differently and you have to accept that and be there for them and respect their wishes. Life is not easy and luckily many illnesses can have complete recovery and our knowledge of treating them and looking after those effected has changed so much. There are so many Agencies out there with professional help for those that need it.

When in life we hit bad times like this we have to try to live every day and love those around you, a big hug is at times better than words.

Thinking of you all.

“Life is like juggling five balls in the air. They are Health, family, friends, and integrity, and career/ achievement. These balls are not the same: the important thing to remember that the career ball is made of rubber but the others are more fragile.  You can take more risks with the rubber ball, you may take more risks with this ball as if you drop it will eventually bounce back. Normally this ball does not suffer long – term damage. The other four balls need to be looked after more carefully.

If you drop one of these it will be damaged and may even shatter.

So long as we have our Health, family, friends and integrity we can overcome life’s hurdles.”




About heavywhalley.MBE

Mountain Rescue Specialist. Environmentalist. Spent 37 years with RAF Mountain Rescue and 3 years with a civilian Team . Still an active Mountaineer when body slows, loves the wild places.
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6 Responses to When the world stops! Dealing with bad news?

  1. I can particularly relate to the meaning of your last paragraph Heavy, sadly many employers and particularly the Military and it’s commissioned officers are unable to support subordinates when family life or quality of life affects what they see as commitment. I say no more, maybe our dearest Mark Anthony taken from us at the young age of 12 years would still be here had we had more understanding of his plight. In a word the support after Markies death from RAF Lossiemouth was apauling whilst the support we received from my detachment unit, RAF Kinloss was outstanding. Please no reply warranted, I’ve said my peace.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. John Armstrong says:

    Live for today, this is not a rehearsal

    Many thanks again for your blog Heavy
    All the best

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Duncan Cameron says:

    Just read your great post and blogs, from a snowy cabin in Alaska where I have been working the last six months. Maybe an old article, but symbolises the true essence of MRT then and present day, we are all proud to be part of. Back home to Lochaber this month, then a trip up to Lochinver to see as you say “Some of the best wild country in the world” as Becky is the Locum GP for a stint. Life is good.
    Duncan Cameron

    Liked by 1 person

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