When Technology lets you down. A Zoom Funeral for my brother. My brother hated technology maybe he is laughing now?

In my time I have been to so many different funerals. Most have been a “Celebration of life”some have been very sad a young life lost on the mountains or worse through illness. All are so different.

I lost My brother recently he had a full life and passed away aged 76. He lived in Bermuda with his family for 50 years. Sadly due to Covid we could not even send one family representative to the funeral. It’s a strange time for all when a loved one is so far away.

The funeral was to be on “Zoom “we as a family all logged in and waited and somehow it did not happen. That was a strange hour to be sitting there alone watching a screen and it trying to connect? Had we done something wrong? In the end it was a problem with the technology so no one in the UK saw it . It had been a strange time as we had waited expectantly. I could not concentrate for over a week and as a family we were all in touch. I had used Zoom before and it is handy but a strange medium for many.

Yet to me a funeral is not the time to say things about those you love. To me you should never leave things undone especially in these strange time’s. I was left feeling very strange and had rarely felt so.

I will go out as soon as Covid allows and head for the mountains my brother loved. That is where I get my peace from. I am lucky to still be able to do this and need that “fix” . It is my way of coping and always has been. We all grieve differently in our own way. He loved the Bothies we both did and I took him to some great places when he came home. I will go again when Covid is over and have my own thoughts .


Just now I am thinking of all the family in Ayr and Bermuda . During my life seeing so much tragedy in the mountains it makes so differently when you lose someone.

I had a walk yesterday it was thawing after the heavy snow and met a young pal out running. It was great to see her and her pal. They stopped for a blether and it meant a lot. My brother ran all of his life and it was his way of coping with life. Time had dragged this weekend waiting for the funeral I could not settle or do much. I had a last wander down by the beach last night just before darkness about one hour before the funeral was due to start in Bermuda .

The sky was incredible so big and alive it had been a grey day with a cold wind at times. I saw the usual wildlife that I take for granted the Heron, Oystercatchers and a Curlew I see them every day and so many others. We are spoiled really as nature shows us life goes on. Yet the light so beautiful and the colours were wonderful. I think it was natures way of saying things will be alright. It did give me and my family time to reflect as we waited maybe it was just what I needed.

My brother hated technology I think he would be laughing at what’s happened? He is free from pain now from his cancer and hopefully at peace.

RIP Michael. We are all thinking of Fay and family in Bermuda and my family in Scotland .

About heavywhalley.MBE

Mountain Rescue Specialist. Environmentalist. Spent 37 years with RAF Mountain Rescue and 3 years with a civilian Team . Still an active Mountaineer and loves the wild places.
This entry was posted in Family, Friends, Health, Mountaineering, People, Well being. Bookmark the permalink.

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